Mission Call

This is where I am going to quickly write about my feelings for the call. I had gone through a lot trying to decide if a mission was right for me. I didn't think I could be the kind of person who handled it well. I was signing up for my London Study abroad, and in the end I couldn't get myself to fully commit to it. Something kept coming into my mind: mission. I was the person who did NOT want to go on a mission. I had fully determined that it was not for me. Good for those who chose to go, not my thing. However, as I came down to these last few weeks, I didn't feel like I was supposed to do anything else. I put my papers in and in a matter of days my papers were submitted. I didn't feel totally sure. I was always edgy when I brought it up and I didn't want others to know or to talk about it. But flash forward to tonight, I was so anxious I think I could have laid an egg. I opened that envelope and when I saw the word Cambodia, I think my heart could have been so heavy it would have brought me to the floor. Nevertheless, I read on and sure enough, in a matter of minutes, I felt "that feeling". It is indescribable, really, but it is true that I felt so much love and excitement for this wonderful corner of the world. Who is to say that the Cambodians don't need the gospel any less than I do? I am so excited to go there. I thought I would never be able to live in a place like that, and I know it will be so difficult, but I am ready. I can hardly wait. I don't know what is coming, but I trust the Lord 100%. Something I will keep with me is that my grandpa said, "you learn the Book of Mormon in your head at home, but on the mission, you know it in your heart." I don't know if I will be a good missionary. I don't know if I am going to be able to live in a third world country, but I do know that the Lord trusts me. He knows I am going to survive. I am truly thrilled. I have never felt this feeling in my life. I am so happy. It is incredible. I love this church. I am so grateful that I have the opportunity of a lifetime. we are blessed.